Having your cake and eating it too

I am making a very good chocolate cake. That is actually the name of it. I don’t know if mine will be as good as the cake I actually had at the Watershed in Decatur, GA a couple of years ago, but since it is the same recipe, I am crossing my fingers it is pretty darn close. It is for Molly’s Birthday party tomorrow night in Louisville.

So, I feel like I have been in a total funk today. Ever since lunch time, when I didn’t say much and got up and wandered around instead of talking to my friends. I just feel really confused about my future and my skills and my talent. I know I am a good designer, but lately, I have been screwing up here and there at work. Just small things, but things I know or am just not paying attention to. It really isn’t an intentional thing, but it just goes back to my lack of organization. I struggle with it on a daily basis. Today, for example, my boss had to take my files and make sure I correctly laid it out. The lay out itself wasn’t bad, it was quite good, but the mechanics and pics and fonts and all were what he was checking on. I think I have a lot of great ideas, but my attention to detail sucks and I always miss stuff I should notice. I think I am doing fine and then, it hits, I have messed something up and it is really bothering me as of late. It’s like my talent is being weighed down by these pesky problems. It really gets me down. Maybe it is the place I work and the proofing process there. I really wish we had a traffic manager or some other system that would help me and proofread carefully over things I do. I really do not like being the only one to see things. I like backup and then some. I guess after working at that printing company and making so many mistakes, it has just got to that point. I don’t think I have ever fully gotten over it. Anyway, I am just blabbing. Blabbing and tired, that is me. I’m sure tomorrow will be a great day, but I’m thinking about going to bed and just calling it a night. I can barely keep my eyes open.

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