I don’t know what it is, I was kind of a bitty the past couple of days. First, I was very rude to Donna (the other designer) at work and smart allecky (is that how that is spelled). And today, I felt a lot like that, too. Of course, I apologized, but it is a general funk. At one point, I was thinking…what is wrong with me? Where did this come from? I don’t know if it was hormonal or what or a combination of my job getting to me. I don’t like feeling that way.

I’m not very good at dealing with stress. Deadlines and pressure to get stuff out on the spot really gets to me. That is part of why I snapped at her. Usually, I am a lot better…for example, if someone told me the total details of a job (ex. They have to have this in their hands to mail out on Friday, rather than a “get it out today” relaxed statement). I know that is the nature of design, but I would have stayed extra last night, so that I was better prepared to get something done today. Does that make sense? I don’t know what I can do to be better prepared. It is something I constantly struggle with.

Working there is chaos. Days like this make me think…”Is this going to happen to me wherever I may go?” Why are some people just naturally better at dealing with stress than others?