While I love my blog, I feel like it is not a true representation of who I am. I mean, my blog is the surface me…what everyday people see of me…the funny, random Kentucky girl. The girl who is always laughing and smiling and doing stuff for other people, but sometimes I just feel sad, and I guess that’s ok, but I can’t turn to my blog. I mean, I don’t want people to worry or wonder what’s wrong with me. I don’t want to reveal that layer, that part of me that is covered up by crafting, television marathons, and silly antecdotes. I don’t know – that’s too much for me to unleash on the world wide web. I can’t let that side of me show. Probably this entry is the closest to the real me that most people will see…I don’t want to make you think that the fun stuff isn’t part of who I am, because it is, but it’s only a fraction of who I am, and I’m sure others can relate to what I am saying.
Why so somber? I don’t know…going to two weddings and staying up so late, perhaps. I often think of that Five for Fighting Superman song and how he talks about how “it’s not easy to be me”. While I know I’m not the only one who feels this way, I do know, that I need to be more in tune and stop trying to drown out the person that I am. I need to feel. I need to hurt from time to time and I need to just be me – even if it is sometimes hard to do.
you aren’t alone in your thinking/feelings. i feel like blogs are more like pictures. they are only a snapshot of who you truly are. no matter how much you write, it will never be an exact representation of you.
I can always gauge how I’m feeling about myself or life in general by how much I write on my blog. When I’m stressed or feeling down, there’s always a gap between posts. That’s when my good old paper journal comes in handy!